April 14, 2010

Update-Mama, This-That and Buckets-o-Tears!

Hey ya'll.....
First I want to sincerely offer my gratitude to each of you for praying for my Sweet Mama and my family.  My sister and I have felt our arms lifted and heart encouraged by your prayers, comments and emails!  Thank you from the bottom of my heart and I humbly ask for your continued prayers as we navigate the transition of Mama's special needs as a result of her stroke last week and horrendous fall and leg wound.  My sister Diane arrived Monday and together we are making decisions for our Sweet Mama's care and it's been so very difficult and heart breaking to say the least.

So much has happened in Mama's life since my last post.  I've literally seen her mental state change and her body age so rapidly.....very sad...tears.  But, I know her times are in His hands, so I rest in that and my sis and I do everything with His power working through us to comfort and love her through this season.  Last Sunday she was transfered to a wonderful skilled wound care and rehabilitation hospital and were told that she would be there approx 6 to 8 weeks but learned yesterday that due to medicare guidelines and assessments she will be released 4/26 and must go to a 24 hour skilled nursing facility.  (So much buracracy and governmental red-tape.... I shutter to think what we are facing with Obama Care....very scary.....'nuf about that!!)!  Anyway, Diane and I cried buckets yesterday.  We visited many skilled 24 hour nursing care facilities and Senior group homes and were overwhelmed by the whole nursing home thing. Many times we pulled over on the side of the road or paused in fast food parking lots to pray for guidance and cried our eyeballs out!  I wouldn't even think of placing my Mama in most of those facilities.......Now that I think about it, I wouldn't even put Murphy my kitty there!  BUT, we know that He is faithful and will lead us to the right place for Mama!

Got home late last night after an extremely emotional day and was very blue....I'm just being real here my bloggin' peeps....I was overwhelmed with sadness and disappointment and cried another bucket full - (wow, I sure have been a cry baby!!).   My Sweetie and I and our kids have had a family trip to FL planned for many months to celebrate the return of our wonderful SIL Bryan (whose just like our own son) home from deployment tomorrow (PTL whoo! hoo!).....big welcome home plans in the works and I was so excited about spending time with our daughter Katie! (We're still praising Jesus for raising her up from near death last December)!!  Glory to God!!  BUT, I knew in my heart the right thing to do was to let them go on without me.....I needed to stay here and trust God to help my sis and I find the right place for Mama.

This a.m. was really tough.  Watching them fly off without me and then calling Katie and telling her I wasn't coming was so hard (understatement!).  She totally understands but is very disappointed......we  encouraged each other in the Lord and then I cried another bucket......ummm I think that's bucket no. 3 or 10....lost count!!  After the waterworks stopped I regrouped with the Lord and sis and I prayed together before heading out to another day of touring nursing home facilities and then to the hospital to be with Mama.  While in prayer, the Holy Spirit spoke two scriptures to my heart and another to Diane.  I personalized those scriptures and quickly jotted them down to carry in the car with us.  His Word is so powerful....we started our day bleary-eyed and heavy hearted BUT carried on in His strength and direction and the leading of the Spirit.  Throughout the day we pulled out our scripture cards and spoke them over us before touring a nursing facility.  We've had such a sense of peace this day and the last facility we visited this afternoon seems to be the right one.  I'll be starting the process of Mama's placement there tomorrow a.m.!  We've got a long, unknown transition to navigate ahead BUT He is always faithful and hears and answers the heart cries of His children!!!

Below are the familiar scriptures that the Lord encouraged us with today (please pardon my chicken scratch - wrote them hurriedly).  Maybe you're in a place of needing Divine direction, wisdom and clarity as to which way to turn and maybe sadness and despair is looming over your emotions.  If so, I encourage you to grab these paraphrased promises of God and keep them before your eyes, pray them, speak them and trust in His Faitfulness to see you through to victory.  It may not be overnight and you may feel as if you'll cry buckets of tears, but He knows where you are and what you're going through and He will bring you through to the other side!!!  HE IS FAITHFUL!!!

Thanks again, wonderful bloggy praying friends!

......The ernest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.
James 5:16 NLT

I'm outta buckets and resting upon the promises of God!

Love, Hugs and Sweet Blessings!
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Angela said...

I'm praying for your day and praising the Lord that He has gone on before you to make the crooked places straight and the rough patches smooth.

SusanD said...

Rejoicing with you for the faithfulness of God, the voice of His Spirit who guides us, and the power of His word. Praying for you, your sis, and your Mom. Blessings, SusanD

Andrea said...

Oh, sweet friend, I am soooo very sorry you have faced and continue to face difficult days. Know that I am praying for you...for GODLY discernment; for strength; favor; peace and comfort! Also, sending BIG hugs....
Storming the heavens,

Debbie said...

Oh Jackie I was crying right along with you when I read this. Soo hard. And yet, seeing the hand of God in this and leading of the Holy Spirit to just the right place...oh praise God. I am sorry you are going through all of this, but I am glad you have your sister and our God by your side. I feel soo bad you are missing the visit and party with your daughter and SIL...soo bad. I can imagine how you were looking foward to hugging your girl and welcoming home your SIL. But, God will give you the comfort you need...your mama needs you now. I will continue praying for you. HUGS, Debbie

Saleslady371 said...

I'm praying for you and sis and your mom, Jackie. Love the personalized prayers. I'll join you in these uplifting, lifegiving words of life.

Mary Moss said...

Oh dear friend! We have been on a similar journey. My once independent and vital mother in law suffered a stroke last fall and she has not been the same.

We struggle daily with the right thing to do for her and on the best days we think, we should allow her to go home--her desire. On the not-so-good days we know that would just not be safe.

We're in the process of making some hard decisions as well, though it sounds as if we are not in quite as desperate straits as are you with your mom--she is having a much harder time.

I will keep you and your family in my prayers. I'm glad you were "real" about what you're thinking and feeling. God is putting on my heart that I need to do more of that lately.

Blessings and hugs,

Karen said...

I'm praying for you and your family, Jackie...haven't gone through this with a parent, but I was with my mom when she walked a similar path with my granddaddy...the Lord guided her and gave her strength to do what she thought she could not...just as He is guiding you and your sister...and your mom...she is in His hands...the best place ever to be....

Anonymous said...

I am so sad your Mama is suffering. I can hear how much you love her by what you write. She is very blessed to have you guys to take care of her. Thanks for the scriptures and the testimony. It was very encouraging. I just went through my very close mentor (Spiritual Dad) being in the hospital for 9 months. It was hard to go through. Cried many buckets, too. I pray for God's angels to comfort you and your family.



Nana Jul said...

How emotionally wrenching....buckets of tears. But to see the Lord working through his word to you and your sister...that's just AWESOME stuff!! You are all in my prayers..Look to the Lord for your strength. He will guide you through it all.

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