May 31, 2012


Me and Peppy

Hey ya'll.......

In full disclosure I must tell you that you'll probably need tissue for this post. I'm bawling my eyeballs out and I know my broken heart will surely overflow through my fingertips and onto the keyboard as I'm typing...just crying saying.  My heart is very full so the post is gonna be a little long also....So please bare with me, sweet bloggin' friends as I share. I think in the end you will be blessed.

Yesterday morning as my hubs and I drove to the stable and made the usual stop by Albertsons to buy carrots for my beloved twenty-seven year old horse Peppy, I had no idea it would be my last.  Day before yesterday, the barn owner, Joy, called and shared her concerns over Peppy having trouble putting weight on his hind legs.  My hubs and I immediately drove to the barn and found him limping but still happy as always, eating, drinking and bright eyed.....even in old age, Peppy is everybody's dream horse.  Always a joy, never mean or cranky and a total easy keeper and loved by everyone!  Ironically, I have a post in que about how the Lord fulfilled my lifelong dream of owning such a wonderful horse and how by His leading I found Peppy on a sunny Phoenix day twenty years ago....totally a God thing!  I'll share that post one day soon. before yesterday....I called the vet and explained the symptoms and because of Peppy's age we agreed that he needed further evaluation  and she agreed to meet us at the barn yesterday morning.  

Before leaving for the barn yesterday, I prayed and asked the Lord to give me strength and courage for the day and I must testify that He did just that......His faithfulness always amazes me.  Upon arriving at the barn yesterday, we found Peppy to be very lethargic, barely moving and not eating or drinking......not even his fav carrots would coax him.  I knew in my heart that this was not good.  The vet arrived and after thoroughly examining him she felt that possibly there was some sort of neurological problems or possibly a tumor involving his spine.  With hot tears flowing and my heart breaking I made the decision that it was time to euthanize Peppy.  I spent a few lingering precious last moments with my wonderful buddy, hugging his neck and as my tears fell upon his beautiful black mane I patted his velvet muzzle one last time.   My hubs and I cried and group hugged Peppy and bid him farewell as Joy the barn owner wept. It was one of the most difficult things I've ever had to do, but God was with me and gave me the courage and strength to do what I had to do.  I spent the afternoon on the couch crying and pouring my heart out to the Lord and after awhile of blubbering, sweet memories of my years with Peppy began to flood my heart and mind.  I knew that it was Him comforting me and ministering peace in the midst of such a stormy heartbreaking day.

One of the sweetest memories I have was when we had our own little ranch in Flagstaff and I was living my dream.  We had the cutest little ranch house complete with two wood stoves for heat and a wonderful red barn and pasture.   What a joy it was to watch from my kitchen window as Peppy and Chief (my hubs horse at the time) horsed around in the pasture....simply heaven to this horse lovin' gal's heart, ya'll! And oh, BTW, when we sold our ranch we gave Chief to some dear friends of ours who were in the Cowboy/Rodeo Ministry and whenever people ask us what ever happened to our beautiful Chief, we always tell them that Chief went into the ministry :)).  

My red barn was so special to me.  I had the most precious prayer encounters and sweet fellowship with the Lord in that barn...I guess you could say my barn became my prayer closet and He always met me there as I did my daily barn chores amidst the sights and sounds of Peppy and Chief chewing their hay and grain.   One day as I was raking the barn floor, I asked the Lord why I love horses the way I do....and I will NEVER forget His reply....."I understand...I'm coming back riding a white horse"!  I nearly did a cartwheel like a child through the breezeway when I heard His reply!  Even as I type these words, His words are just as fresh and real as the day He whispered them within my heart!  Thank you Jesus!!

Peppy and I rode the trails of the beautiful ponderosa covered mountains near our ranch and always enjoyed the vast beauty of God's creation.  With only the sound of shuffling hooves, the creaking of my leather saddle and the gentle breezes blowing through the pines we often encountered elk, wild turkey and beautiful song birds.....simply heaven, ya'll!  

Peppy and I also shared many wonderful cool early morning rides in the Phoenix desert, too.  Peppy had a quick steady cadence to his step and I have the most wonderful memories of singing this chorus over and over as we clip clopped through the beautiful desert and I'll never forget his ears flicking back and forth as I sang....priceless!

What a mighty God we serve (clip clop)
What a mighty God we serve (clip clop)
Angels bow before Him, Heaven and earth adore Him,
What a mighty God we serve (clip clop)
 He is the King of Kings (clip clop)
He is the Lord of Lord's (clip clop)
His name is Jesus, Jesus, Jesus! 
Ohhhhhhhh, He is the King! (clip clop)

Peppy was so trustworthy...never spooked, never kicked, bucked or bolted.  One day as we clip clopped through the desert we walked right up on a big coiled rattle snake.  Most horses would have spooked and bolted and thrown their rider.  But, not Peppy, he just put it into high gear and we galloped away through the desert until we were a safe distance from danger.  I'm certain we looked like a  scene out of an old cowboy movie for sure....And I loved every minute of it...Mane and tail flaring in a flat out gallop...yeee hah!  I thank God for protecting us and bringing us safely back to the barn that day...yay God!

You know, I realize when Christians raise the question of whether or not animals go to Heaven it can stir up a very interesting theological debate.  And I have no intentions of doing so on my blog.  However, I personally believe that there is a very good possibility that they do (great resource "Heaven" by Randy Alcorn)!  Seriously now, for certain there is one horse in Heaven and Revelations 19:11-14 tells us that Jesus is returning on His white horse (remember what the Lord spoke to me in my barn?!) and the many white horses for the armies that will follow him!  This makes my heart sing, ya'll!

I believe that perhaps, when Peppy took his last breath he galloped into Glory and is now gallantly and freely running through unending unfenced glorious pastures with the herd of Heaven, ya'll!  And if so.....I'll see my buddy again one day and we will ride through Glory together and again I will sing as we clip clop on streets of gold.....HE IS THE KING OF KINGS, HE IS THE LORD OF LORDS....HIS NAME IS JESUS, JESUS, JESUS!

Farewell Peppy....Oh, what a wonderful run we had!
I'll see you again someday, buddy!


Sweet Blessings!
Photo Credits:  Tissue box via
        Jesus on white horse via google images
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Karen said...

Oh, Jackie, I am so sorry for your loss...and I was indeed blessed by this post...

When you shared what the Lord spoke to your heart about returning on His white horse...I had goosebumps with the tears!

Mandy said...

Jackie, thank you for sharing your heart. I'm so sorry for your loss. I am smiling though, when I read of your revelation of Jesus coming on a white horse and how He is faithfully caring for you!

Debbie said...

Oh Jackie I am sooo sorry to hear about this. I can see how broken your heart is, but at the same time how comforted you have been by our Lord. I found your message from Him in the barn to be quite exciting and inspiring as well. Such wonderful pictures. Praying for you...Debbie

Debby@Just Breathe said...

I am so sorry for your loss.

NanaDiana said...

You are right- I have been bawling since I opened your blog today. God bless you- Well, God HAS blessed you and even though your sweet baby is no longer here with you he is only a memory away. I hope that each day will get better for you-

I know it is not the same but about 3 years ago I took in my sweet little Mistycat for what I thought was going to be an evaluation because she wasn't eating properly and was vomiting sometimes....and the vet took one look at her-did an ultrasound and there was a big tumor blocking food from coming into her stomach. With her age I decided not to put her through any more pain and had to say goodbye there at that moment. I bawled all the way home and for days afterwards. I GET IT! xo Diana

Anonymous said...

:0(...always sad when we lose those animals that have been as faithful to us---sometimes more so---than our human friends. Thank you for sharing. And I agree with the idea that animals will be in heaven. They are after all, His creation and were creadted to bring Him glory :0)!

elaine @ peace for the journey said...

OK... in tears here (as you predicted). The vision of Peppy galloping through heaven did me in. Yes, wouldn't it be grand to see him again, running the wild and open fields of heaven! I think that would be a beautiful grace indeed. And why in the world wouldn't there be animals in heaven? They were God's idea to begin with, even as we are.

Blessings to you as you tenderly walk through this season of grief.


NanaNor's said...

Dearest Jackie, My heart is heavy for you-as you loved Peppy, so I have loved dogs. I too believe that there is a special place in heaven for our beloved pets-I think the Lord knows how much the love us and vice-versa and I believe there is evidence in the Word to support all living creatures bowing before the Lord.
May your memories bring you smiles and may the Spirit give you comfort. Peppy would say thank you for letting him go.
Hugs and love, Noreen

Sandy said...

I am so sorry to hear about your precious friend, Jackie. As a true animal lover I totally understand your loss. It is so hard to lose one of our pets because they are just like family. I am praying for you.
Love you,

BARBIE said...

I am so sorry Jackie. Praying for you!

Amrita said...

So sorry for you loss. Peppy was a dear friend.

May God comfort you

Thistle Cove Farm said...

The only comfort I can give is you'll meet Peppy again in heaven. Truly, I believe this; as Martin Luther said, "In the resurrection little dog, you shall have a golden tail" or words to that effect.
Those with eyes to see and ears to hear...

Lea said...

Oh, what a heart breaker and isn't it wonderful that we serve a God that cares about our EVERY heartache. I am so sorry about Peppy, he was a beautiful horse.

May you feel God's peace and comfort in the days and weeks ahead as you adjust to life without Peppy. Blessings!

Patrinas Pencil said...

I love horses too! I was overjoyed to hear you say that Peppy galloped off into heaven. I can truly picture that...

How difficult this must be for you. I can't even imagine. And to have just read your current post of praising God for all the good things ... in the midst of your grief is such a testament to your faith. That's what I love about you. You always exude with JOY.

I love your stories. I am always blessed to visit you at your place. And thank you for being so faithful to visit me.

I will remember to look for you and Peppy when I reach heavens doors. Maybe you can teach me to ride :)

Patrina <")>><

Debbie Petras said...

Jackie, I'm so sorry for your loss of Peppy. And yes, I do believe there are horses in heaven. I also read Randy Alcorn's book "Heaven".

Sorry it's been a while since I last visited your blog. I know you were on a blogging break for a time but wondered how you are now. I too love horses but have never owned one. We also used to have a home in Flagstaff for many years. We seem to have much in common, including our location in the Phoenix area. So maybe we can get together this summer for some iced tea and talk? I just returned from California and will be heading off to Florida next week but after that ...

Blessings and love,

Deborah Ann said...

Oh, that's gotta be hard. I will pray for comfort and peace for you. I didn't know you had horses? I have always wanted one, but I guess my dog Otis will have to do.

May God hold you in His arms and cause his love to spill over you...

Crown of Beauty said...

My dearest Jackie,
Your name was on my heart this morning as I entered the blog neighborhood. Oh, yes, I haven't been visitin many blogs lately, as I had been away on a ministry trip, and just began doing some blog posts again.

I went to your latest post about the beautiful holiday you will be having in Florida, and Georgia, and other places... and scrolled down to read some of your other posts.

Oh, this one made me cry so much. I love animals, and though I have never owned a horse, I've ridden a few in my younger years. I love horses. It has always been my dream and I know it will become true in heaven, to have my own horse. Loved the book Black Beauty when I was small.

May God comfort you, as it has only been a month ago since your beloved horse went home to heaven.

Yes, I do believe our pet animals who have gone ahead of us are waiting for us in our own mansion in heaven.

With much love

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